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the Minivan Song

from Feelings Hog by Jim Krewson

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lyrics

We're just a two timin" hippie and a bow-legged stripper
in a minivan
Sellin' peoples old junk, and always keepin' one step ahead of the MAN
and when the lights go down on the Pennsacola Flea Market parking lot
we're gonna check into a sleazy hotel
hit the Applebee's and RAISE SOME HELL
we're just a two timin' hippie and a bow legged stripper in a minivan

Well I went to the ladies' room to buy myself a tampon
took a gander at the roadmap to find out which highway we're on
can ya toss me a quarter cause I gotta have some of those Andy Capp Hot Fries
then I wind up blinded by the smoke ring tears comin' into my eyes

chorus

Hey mister can I offer you a 20 and a quarter for that beat-up old guitar?
well I'll betcha half a dollar that the FBI knows where we are
but I didnt rape nobody, why cant you all just leave a feller alone?
honey hand me that Thai stick I'm feelin' like I wanna get stoned...

chorus

And when we get to Tijuana gonna be who we wanna be and set up camp
gonna push out some babies, never let another motherfucker call me tramp... again!
but for right now darlin' just you keep on a-shakin' it on top of that sticky bar
and if it makes no difference to ya honey I'll go wait in the car

chorus

credits

from Feelings Hog, released December 19, 2020
With additional vocals by KikiDufault

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Jim Krewson Catskill, New York

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